Piss off...

Thursday, January 06, 2011

Starbucks is Creeping my Ass Out

Actual blog posts on Starbucks.com in honor of their newly tweaked logo:

"Let’s go all the way back to 1971, to when Starbucks was first coming to be. In a search for a way to capture the seafaring history of coffee and Seattle’s strong seaport roots, there was a lot of poring over old marine books going on.

yaarrr, maytey!

"Suddenly, there she was: a 16th century Norse woodcut of a twin-tailed mermaid, or Siren. There was something about her – a seductive mystery mixed with a nautical theme that was exactly what the founders were looking for.


"But the Siren has always been there. She is at the heart of Starbucks.

Oh, I thought it was upcharging...

"As a writer, though, I can tell you that there is a lot more to her than just the design and how she looks. This is what she means to me, and to us.

"She is a storyteller, carrying the lore of Starbucks ahead, and remembering our past. In a lot of ways, she’s a muse –always there, inspiring us and pushing us ahead.

"And she’s a promise too, inviting all of us to find what we’re looking for, even if it’s something we haven’t even imagined yet.


"She means something different to every one who sees her, who knows her. For me she’s kind of the final say on the spirit of everything I write and everything we do. Even as I’m writing this, I wonder what she thinks. (She likes it, by the way.)

NOW we've crossed over into a whole new dimension of disturbing...

"Here we are today. Our new evolution liberates the Siren from the outer ring, making her the true, welcoming face of Starbucks.

Steve M., senior writer

I need a shower...


Blogger bluesleepy said...

Holy crap, srsly?! These people have clearly drunk too much of their shitty espresso (triple shot, much?!). Also, I find the original icon a little disturbing, what with the fins of the mermaid spread out on either side. But that's just me.

6:57 PM

Blogger b-dub said...

Siren, her mermaid fins spread seductively, landed on the desk, her head slightly cocked, ready to tell the author what she thought. He had waited for this moment. And finally it had come...

7:21 PM


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