Piss off...

Sunday, August 22, 2010


Yeah, I was saying about keeping the fingers moving?

Well, they have been, but not here. I still do love this blog, though. And in that spirit, here's a re-run! Nine years ago today - extremely memorable day in my life. It wen't a lil' sumtin' like this...

Title: Sometimes we're nuts.

Day Two of the Buttfucked by Ryder Tour 01: Have you ever pushed 80-85 in a 10' Ryder through the deserted night of Montana? It's an experience that should be jumped on.

Fifteen hours in a Ryder, at least twelve in Montana (sic). Yeah, it happened, and it went down something like this...we left Moses Lake, WA at 7:50 a.m. PST, wired on gas station 'ccino and '60s bubblegum/'80s cheeze wiz radio. The miles rolled on and Eastern Washington State got kinda booring. Little did we know what was ahead. Idaho: Beautiful at first. The downside of Lookout Pass, very steep and winding. Nothing but Jeezo Radio, a "wholesome alternative to secular radio." Fucking booring, looks like the scenery at Big Thunder Mountain at Disney. Western Montana: LoLo National Forest. Very green and hilly, trains passing under mountains monogramedwith the town name (Alberton had a 200-odd foot "A" landscaped into the side of a mountain). Missoula: Americana outpost on the flats. Target, Best Buy, Hardees, a sushi joint (sic). Lunch at Perkins: crewcut/moustache service with a flat, laconic twang ("Ho's it gon' for y'todey?"). Hot but dry, a soft haze looming above the vast plains and monogramed mountain. Butte to Bozeman: The Rockies. Lewis & Clark territory. Winding downhill through jagged peaks and scrub-brush. Sun descending over the hills and far away smoke from Wyoming forest fire. As darkness fell on the way to Billings, the quest to make Miles City, MT was agreed upon. I picked up the wheel at a truck stop somewhere before Billings. Two things hit me at that outpost on the darkened plain. A: I was totally out of place for not wearing a cowboy hat. B: Just how far from home I was, geographically, mentally, and otherwise. But it's good to have that kind of opportunity for shift in perspective, and I'm certainly better for it. So I loaded up on 'ccino and prepped for the drive...made industrial refinery Billings and crossed over onto 94E, pushing 75-80-85 in a 10' Ryder (Mortimer) across the deserted night of Montana. Exhilerating, liberating. Felt like Neil Cassidy. Construction delays, grooved roads, not a soul competing for highway space. Pulling over to see the stars, the Milky Way hovering brighter than I've ever known in the Big Sky night. Pulled into Miles City on an empty tank at 11:30-ish MST. Fucking unreal: 15 hrs, 3 states, nearly all of Montana in one day. Total insanity on the plains.

Motel 6 has been good to us thus far...


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